PapaIan do really misses me that much…    hahahaha (suya tambling)  He’s so, so back in business… as in his questionings and painstaking assessment are so in today, but infairnes it wasn’t a bloody converse (for me) as we exchange mails.  Oh yezz! I didn’t had a hard time replying and comprehending his emails ‘coz I made all those replies all by myself.  Now, i realize.. oh not realize!… I proved it now.. as in i super mega confirm that it only because of *gsd and/or *jst whose only making me obscure (or even to the point “stupid”) because the thing is that… when PapaIan has this certain question, of course i hand it to them his mail.. and then they’ll give me this reply for PapaIan who doesn’t even answer Ian’s question.  There even this certain incident that I’ll never, ever forget when I receive this mail from PapaIan containing his question and then with a follow up request… asking if it’s possible for us to segregate those native from first class (i’ll not mention na lang what’s that thing ‘coz my job is so confidential..charut!!!) so here it goes… oh by the way all replies, entire communication I sent in our emails is composed by my boss though I had my name written as if I really did that reply (hhmmp!) Well anyways, the reply we sent to papaian is another question from questions hahahaha… nakakaloka.  O d ba, instead of answering ian’s question and request we sent him another question ohlalala!!! ang saya! and the best part there is I had my name there when I didn’t made that letter huhuhuhu… o di ba ako naman ang nagmukhang tanga! ang saya!

OMG! it’s really 2009 now… and i’m gettin’ older and older lolz…

It’s been two months na pala since my last journal in here.. ~owkay~!  ‘coz im’ma busy career woman… as in kina-career ko tlaga ang work.. though I’m starting to loose that love in my job

hhmm chumu-chorva na naman akech *kainis*  hahaha

Gosh it’s so discreet kanina sa office.  We’re only 5 who were present then plus GSD… Wala ang mga pasaway.. ang mga vulgar na akala mo nasa magkabilang ibayo’ng bundok sila kung nag-uusap na kung silipin mo sila eh magkaharap lang naman pala sila’ng nag-uusap.  Syempre hindi ko rin naman ika-ila na maingay din ako, pero mas malala sila noh!  swear!

Anyways, I almost thought that this day’s a peaceful one for the more than four corners of door 2 of Maddisen building… not until when Wilma gurl stepped inside the office for second time around just for that day alone, looking for JST (ever and ever and forever.. amen!)  And as usual, hindi nya naka-usap si sir.  Eh kung hindi ba naman isa’t kalahating gaga ito’ng si ate… sa mga maka-ilang beses sya’ng sinabihan na mag-text muna bago pumunta eh matigas pa rin ang ulo.. kesyo wala daw syang load… kesyo ganito, ganyan.. naku!!! si ate talaga!!!  at bigla ba naman’g nag-demand sa aking kanina na tawagan ko daw si sir.. and take note!!!  I’m gonna use my OWN, PERSONAL mobile.  okeh!!!!  mabuti sana if she approached me in a nice manne, she doesn’t need to be sooooo damn submissive in approaching me, but siguro naman baka pe-pwedeng in friendly way.  It’s as if she’s like my superior giving orders.. abah! abah! abah!!!!  hindi na yata yan makatarungan ate… to think that your purpose is not an official one.

And then, le’mme just share naman yung moment nila ni ate sally…bwahahaha… teka lang… mukatawa sa ko balik… bwaahahahaa… nalingaw man gud ko aning ilang conversatio..  Anyways, of course, same as usual, for nth time.. sinabihan sya ni ate sally:  unta, nag-text sa ka sa iya para dli naka nagastuhan ug pamasahe..pila man imong magasto na pamasahe beh?  She then replied, 200.00 pesos..  (200.00 pesos??!?   From Samal and nasa Lanang lang kami!?!?!??)  Lokah tlaga itong si ate! Subsequently, though in doubt, sinabi pa rin ni ate sally, oh see whereas magtext ka, piso lang.  Haynaku sandamakmak na reasoning ang pina-ulan ni ate.  Kesyo na virus-an iyang phone so gilabay niya.  O d ba bongga!  nagtatapon sya ng cellphone!!  (sino’ng may sabi na naghihirap ang Pinoy??!?!?) Out of curiousity, tanong ni ate sally, unsa diay imong unit? Sagot nya.. kanang 3310 lang gud.

Ate Sally:  aw, ma-virusan diay ng 3310? di ba kanang mga celphone lang man na may camera (she meant those phones that MMS capable)

Wilma that gurl:  ay kanang, cellphone na colored nag-send sa akoa.. na virusan akong phone.. 

So!  meron akong mga ilang katananungan na naglalaro sa aking saloobin na feeling ko it’ll continually disturb  me until Friday… Una, ang 3310 ba na let’s say bagong release, as in 2008 released, ay may bluetooth na?  Krolawa..este ikalawa, assuming it doesn’t have a bluetooth features, paano na-transmit ang virus sa cellphone ng bawat partido? ma-transmit ba ang virus thru text messaging??  I suppose na meron virus ang phone ni Wilma that gurl! Nagtext sya kayJST… si JST nagti-text sa amin… samakatuwid! ang mga cellphone namin’g lahat dito sa opisina ay may mga virus na.. pwes! hala! sa lahat ng mga friendshipness ko, na tini-text ko… I’m so sorry, pero na-virusan pud nako inyon mga phone… –> ganun ba yun??!!   duh!! ambot nimo mother wilma oi… pasaway man ka kaau!

ooopppssss…. meron pa pala akong ikatlong katanungan…. ba’t umabot ng 200.00 pesos ang pamasahe nya? aahhh…. Jetski siguro ag sinakyan nya patawid nga dagat. PERIOD!

If there’s something wrong with the outcome of your report or just simply your paperworks in general, you felt so incessantly embarrassed to your boss to the point that if you could only beg the ground to eat the entire you just to escape from this fuss… not to mention the massive guilt that kills you as if there’s a voice in your mind that keeps on bawling you out: why you sooo stupid!!!??!!

I felt so d*mn angry with myself whenever I’m caught up in situation like this. I feel so weak like I will have an infinite misery (hahayyy). Of course you cannot avoid if you feel depress and disappointed in yourself ‘coz who else are to blame in your stupidity..your rashness..and your recklessness???

But anyways, do you know that it’s even more twice infuriatingly if the liability and BLAME is on you when you are actually not at fault. I had errors then due to my stupid negligence but majority was because of inaccurate datas and flaws from our informants.

But the thing now…it’s a lot different. Well of course my place of being at fault is so consistent. I received an email yesterday from Ts*m0** asking me about the previous report (It was still from last month actually – the week 33 in particular). She’s questioning me about this and that, and that there something wrong..simple as that! As I went over our files it is indeed erroneous. There were slip-ups in the entries and miscalculations on the figures as well. Of course I held liable for this concern because I am in-charge in this particular task in the company.. but this particular report…. I DID NOT DO IT!!! (i did not do it, ok?!?!  I was lying at the hospital then, conquering the “stitch of my life“)… but ironically when this was sent a month ago to the “superiors/principals” through an e-mail containing message that was sent by me… (hahahaha can I just kill you?!) I really over-reacted last month about this.. why put my name when you have your own name?? I mean, you prepared for that report.. you did it all well… but… but why do these people are so afraid and timid to put their name for just a stupid email message?!?!?!?! It just shows that they’re just too cowardly to accept undertakings and hold for responsibilities. SO PATHETIC!! For two years in the company, they never mature! I guess this is one of the reasons why the company is in adversity. The company still struggles because the staff never struggle. Of course, I will not excuse myself from my own shortcomings, I’m not perfect and I have lapses but nonetheless, I know that I have exert enough effort and did my part for this company!

I’m so officially back to work since last week from my two weeks on-leave due to my so-called “secret illness” so this means I am definitely on with my paper works again.  When I got at the office I was disappointed that my PC monitor is still at the computer shop since it the repair is still in progress.. my gosh for two weeks it’s still not yet done?! My monitor in the office is actually an old model (very, very old) and I am assuming that it’s on its way to its extremity because it’s starting produce dark images so to tell you honestly I was praying that the technicians couldn’t be able to fix it because I wanted them (my bosses) to buy me a brand new LCD monitor… wow! how I wish! Or better yet… what about buy me this Sony VAIO Notebook??  It would be very great so I can do my reports wherever I am without any hassles.  But then, actually, I will be very much pleased and glad with desktop PC especially with this HP Compaq dc7600 Convertible Minitower PC Gosh I think I will forever love and never leave my company if they buy me both PCs (LOL). 

Hey do I sound like a demanding staff here?  I think so! Hahaha.. but I’ll still cross my fingers..  Who knows I will be able to get that Sony Notebook by next month

Why are there a lot of insensitive, irrational, and soooooo idiotic fools emerging these days? I just can’t absorb their inane thinking of being such a thick-skinned and careless staff of this company!!! Hindi ko alam kung ano’ng gusto nila’ng ipahiwatig.. ano ba’ng gusto nila’ng mangyari… Or just for a simple reason na gusto lang magpapansin?! Tanga? Nagtatangatangahan? iresponsable or immature… or sadyang ayaw lang gamitin ang utak? I know that I’m not an intelligent person, i don’t even gain honors when I marched down the aisle when I graduated college and high school, but at least I’m trying to functional and helpful dito sa opisina.

Ang gusto ko lng mangyari.. kahit konting considerasyon man lang! At respeto sa mga kasamahan nyo dito sa trabaho… .. o cge kahit wag nyo na ako’ng respetuhin! Kahit yung kompanya na lang natin. Is it righteous to talk INSIDE the office about your affairs in circle of friends, gimmicks the other night, and all those stuff you concerned about, etc, etc, etc… blah..blah.. blah!!! WHATEVER is that, the company couldn’t get profit any single cent with all those absurd things you are talking out loud and with matching laughs pa! And take note, not just laughs… LOUD LAUGHS!!!!

This afternoon at office I knew that I acted inappropriate. I really bash-off my drawer..and yes it is very unbecoming. Ok, sabihin nyo na masyado akong “akala mo kung sino sa office” (akala nyo hindi ko alam na super levakers ko ninyo ana???!! Huh! I’m not stupid as you!) Pero hindi nyo ba naisip na mas sobrang nakakabwisit na kayo???!! Kung hindi ko pa binagsak ng pagkalakas-lakas ung drawer ko, titigil kaya kayo sa kakadakdak nyo jan? Try to put yourself in my shoe… kayo kaya gumawa nung reports? Kayo kaya maka-feel nung pressure tsaka liability everytime there’s fuck’n wrong in those reports? Dili lalum mag-ihap ug pinya ug saging na ginapadala ng tibook shippers sa Davao sa apat na sulok ng mundo, ok!??!?!?!?!?!?!????? Palit na lang kaya tayo ng trabaho? Kahit ung simpleng communication na lang kaya sa barko at sa mga dakong tae sa Japan? Ano? Huh! You wouldn’t even dare to! I’m sure kahit ung simple submission lng ng PD/A aatrasan mo! Anyway, I’m sure that GSD will NEVER trust you to do that… simpleng encoding lang nga hindi mo magawa ng mag-isa! And you’ve got the guts to flaunt that you’re a product of Ateneo? Huh! You’re giving the university a disgrace!

yes! ang kinakatakutan ko these past two months started today officially.  I did the per vessel weekly reports for this week - the week 13…. Gosh i kinda consider 13 as my lucky number, hope i’ll be blessed with good luck for this week 13 report… wala sana’ng mga errors and corrections, and above all wala sana’ng mga follow-up queries from the “big bosses”.  I’m really nervous about this thing for tomorrow, it’s already 1826 hours and I’m not yet done fixing all these paper files.. and I’m super kaba for tomorrow sa mga feedbacks… huhuhu… kahilakon jud ko’g himo ani ganina… PROMISE!  Super, mega pressured ang beauty ko!  

I’m so freakin’ serious with this ‘per vessel ship-out’ thing now… yah! Who would’ve not dare take it as serious matter when your two big bosses are always asking you if I can cope with this concern now ALONE!.. if I can manage to do it all by myself without Ate Lea (Ate Lei!! Ba’t kse aalis ka pa??!!?!?!).. blah blah blah! whatever! This is such a big pain in the ass, you know?! If only I can download Ate Lea’s expertise in this “banana-pineapple’ thing.. as easy as copy-paste or attaching USB in our brains (LOL)

What happened then in the office.. like for instance this afternoon incident, I really don’t know how am I going to feel with my condition. I felt a lot of pressures, anger –> (to that sick looser), and most of all WORRIES. You know..like when JST is asking me about which shipment that a certain consignee belong, (wait am I stating that thing correctly? see I don’t even know how to express it in my own words!) or where did that came from? this and that.. etc..etc..etc.. blah..blah.. uurrrrggg!!! I wanna die!!!

So don’t have a choice but to take these materials home and continue my studies and comprehension with this killer job! hahaayyy parang balik estudyante ako ah.. studying at home?!?! and Ate Lea’s my teacher

California is the place where my great grand Dad migrated and settled for good. According to my Dad, Lolo was constantly communicating with him few years ago.. well that was when we’re still babies Well, he was convincing my Dad to move to the States too and have a stable life their, after all my Lolo already owned a farm their – he has a wide apple plantation there actually, but then knowing my Dad, loyal and very committed to his service that he can’t afford to leave his loved profession in military services. Well, now that working or living abroad is more profitable and of course provide can provide you more favorable life, my sister and I told my Dad that it was really a huge opportunity that he just let go.

California is one of the progressive State in America, and I can’t just imagine this great offer that my Dad has turned down. I’m wondering if we happen to migrate their for real, and since my Lolo is kinda rich there hehehe, we no longer need to acquire for California mortgage or San Francisco home loan ‘coz a house will be given to us, uhhmm well, actually I’m not really sure if we still need to undergone application San Francisco refinance or whatever… because I remember my friend who works as caregiver in San Francisco and eventually brought her family to settle there for good, she told me that it is really expensive to get your own house, good thing San Francisco mortgages and San Francisco equity loans can be avail.

I brought home some materials regarding my new duties in the office. I’m trying to absorb every single bit of grasp that I may earn and learn in this ‘per vessel ship-out’ thing. I want to familiarize everything, I want to study and practice in doing this report but I really don’t know why it is so f*ck’n hard for me to grasp the knack in Math or anything about numbers!

So, here I am now in front of my PC, trying to figure out… but this is such an unlucky day for me… Now, that I’m already prepared and keen to learn, and so serious (to the extent na kina-career ko na talaga..sobra!) but my computer is starting to execute its XP performance now.. yah XP as in expired!! grrr!!! I’m loosing my patience now!! Everytime I overwrite to save my excel file or even ‘unto typing’ command it keeps on hang over and over again… could you just imagine I’m sitting in front of this PC for about 2 hours now and yet I wasn’t even reached half, not even one-fourth to finish this report.. urrgggghh!!! Gosh! it feels like hell! Whenever I save and/or overwrite whatever it is that I had changed it always hangs up.. grrr… So, everytime the MS Excel hangs-up, I switch on to MS Word to write anything that I can blog… just to not waste my time.. hahahayyyy… While having this difficult time of my life at the front of my computer, I saw this Korean Beef Short Ribs recipe.. it’s so mouth-watering dish from Monterey’s cook book.

Here’s how to make it…

INGREDIENTS :

1 Kg Monterey beef shortribs, Korean cut 1000 g

3 tbsp Garlic, minced 42 g

5 tbsp Gochujang (Korean chili bean paste) 135 g

½ cups Soda water 313 g

1 tbsp Sesame Oil 14 g

1 ½ tsp Beef dashida 7 g

1/8 White pepper 1 g

2 Sesame seed (for garnish) 9 g

2 Sesame seeds

20 Onion leeks, julienned

PROCEDURE:

1. Marinate short ribs in all ingredients for 8 hours.

2. Grill. Brush ribs with marinade while grilling. Top with sesame seeds and onion leeks.